A few lessons in Shadowmathics

Hello everybody, Yuhnsu here, world wide known Shadowmathician, I came here to share with you some of my knowledge in spookery.

The main difference between attics and basements is that the horrible science monsters are always in the basement, but the horrible ghost monsters are always in the attic. Examples.

A basement is some place where you put something you want no one to see; nobody goes there, but you remember the things you put there. It's dark, and cold, and a little stuffy. Something horrible that wants to eat you would love waiting down there until you're just - about - asleep. Something like that is material, alive, horrible and hungry for the flesh and blood you just happen to be occupying the space of.

An attic is where you put things you want no one to see for a long time and then forget about. It's where your grandparents leave their cursed Aztec idols and mint copies of the first issue of Playboy (These particular copies were jerked to exclusively by flesh-eating cannibals). Something horrible and older than older than numbers that feels quiet, dry, hungry, would love waiting up there for you. Because one day, you'll get curious. You both know it. And whereas the basement monster shows up while you're sleeping, or waits just past the foot of the stairs, the attic monster waits for you to turn around. Always. Because he knows you will. And the longer you wait, the closer he gets. That might be a mercy - he won't waste time waiting for you to blink if he's already close enough to look you in the eyes.

Of course, neither of them have got shit on the kind that waits for you to turn the light off. Those fuckers can wait for forever, they don't care. They aren't even hungry; you were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Of course, they can't do anything until you turn the light off. Speaking hypothetically, of course. I mean, there's quite a few who prefer the light on - they enjoy waiting just behind people. And it doesn't matter how close they are - they always give you a chance to stare.

Also is anybody else afraid of the ocean? Like that shit is crazy; we know more about our universe than the fucking ocean.

HOW SPOOKY IS THAT SHIT.

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